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Thread: Am I broken? Is it too late to fix me?

  1. #21
    Senior Member Prestigious RippleApple's Avatar
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    In the military, they break you down and remake you from the ground up. If you have wounds they can dig at, then it'll hurt. A lot.

    That kind of approach could be just what you need though.

  2. #22
    Banned Infamous ImAeternalis's Avatar
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    I'm shitty at writing stuff. Can't do it like I used to.

    So I'm just going to throw this out there;

    If you need to talk at all feel free to add me in game or PM me. I hate to see people in distress.

  3. #23
    Senior Member Prestigious BhastetKurza's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ImAeternalis View Post
    I'm shitty at writing stuff. Can't do it like I used to.

    So I'm just going to throw this out there;

    If you need to talk at all feel free to add me in game or PM me. I hate to see people in distress.
    Yeah I'll certainly add you when I get online.
    Wow...

  4. #24
    Senior Member Honoured AllknowingWolf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jezereal View Post
    I'm not sure whether OP is serious, or a troll. If you're trolling this isn't funny.
    If by the off-chance you are serious. I'd go get some actual help from a professional therapist. The internet is no place for this. 95% of us will verbally tear you to shreds. The Internet does not care about the weak. You are never to late to be fixed. But a few people over the internet will not give you what you are searching for, and that is someone to love you. Someone to let you know you are cared for and appreciated. The internet does not have enough love in its soul to muster this. You need real life people to help you with this. I am sorry, we cannot help you here. It is sad and may sound harsh... But it is the truth. I write this with a sincere heart, and hope you understand what I'm saying. This is meant as a sort of reality check rather than a GTFO post. As much as we want to help, we simply can't give you what you ultimately require.
    Since I know this isn't coming from a negative place, but I just want to point out. 95% of the internet isn't youtube. There are entire sites built with the misfits of the world all together in one place. There are sites that are extremely positive or sympathetic toward people who say they are depressed because, as someone said a lot of people are teenagers. The internet is filled with the weak. The internet trolls of the world. They are not secretly successful people. Yes, genuine sympathy and pseudo sympathy can only go so far as to actually helping with the problem.

    Can't say alternatives are 100% better either, I also won't knock therapists, but just seeing what I've seen they are essentially useless. Also all they can do, that people cannot is recommend drugs...and again, won't knock those either. But those couldn't be an more counter productive from the people I've seen them being used on. Also most people that complain about problems, are not trolling. (Again not youtube.) I will say it may come off that way, if one is an adult reading a teenagers perspective on life. But even then teenage drama, isn't the same as trolling. As what may seem like small problems to you, their big problems to them. Just saying.

  5. #25
    Senior Member Infamous Myrkulyte's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AllknowingWolf View Post
    As what may seem like small problems to you, their big problems to them. Just saying.
    A romanian writer made a novel about this
    Creator of the Vent Thread

  6. #26
    Senior Member Infamous Disquieted1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BhastetKurza View Post
    To start, I am far done with the teenage angst and I am 21 going on 22, but I do have a few things to ask if anyone could possibly help.

    -snip-
    What does it mean to be human? Is it to feel emotion? Or to find purpose? Others? All of the above?

    I'm not as old as you are, and therefore I'm not as experienced. However, I've gone through the same thing to a lesser extent. Don't make yourself the victim, and don't pity yourself. I've been bullied and betrayed a number of times. Stand on your own feet, and test the water before you jump in. There's always hope.
    Smite is an online multiplayer game. You can't have immediate gratification simply by starting the game. The ground is even. There's another player on the other side. You are not entitled to having everything favoring you at every time. If you don't like it, by all means, go back to the 1-shot-kills-all Aliens: Colonial Marines singleplayer.

  7. #27
    Senior Member Honoured AllknowingWolf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BhastetKurza View Post
    I will do that. I really don't like being depressed, it's been this way for too long and it has only been getting worse and worses as the years went on.

    I'm sure if I turn things around and find ways to be happy again I can turn my life around.
    I know no one enjoys being depressed, and I know how hard it can be. I know its not something you can just get over. (I've was clinically diagnosed with depression) I'm not depressed anymore either. Just from personal experience, The only real thing that can help is, whatever made you depressed in the first place and do everything in your power to get away from it. As I believe a lot of depression is very environmental. It will always stick around until you leave the environment. I do have a few suggestions. 1. If you don't live on your own/with your parents. Try as hard as you can too be. Two, If being depressed makes you feel alone but you don't want to be burned by bad relationships. Get a pet. Might not seem like it exactly like it applies to your specific problems. But you'd be surprised how many people become happier in life this way. (was gonna post this yesterday but didn't know how old you were so didn't know know if this advice would be worth much.)

  8. #28
    Senior Member Chosen KFire's Avatar
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    I just read your thread (op). I know i cannot really understand what you have been through just by reading that in some minutes, but i think sharing it is a good starting point. I was in a somehow similar condition, but not as far as serious as you describe yours. I am a bit busy right now, but when i get some time to write, I'll come back here.

    I would encourage you to rewrite your whole story for yourself with the positive things that have happened. The path you have taken got you here. You are alive and sane. You are wise enough to seek help, and every second gives you an opportunity to change. If you are not dead you still have a chance.

  9. #29
    Junior Member Senior Cupidhead EmmaMye's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BhastetKurza View Post
    Is what I'm doing wrong? People have told me to not do this because when I met new friends or the woman that is the one, I wouldn't be equipped to help them and I'd potentially let them down and ruin something in their lives because they need me. I'm a person many people look up to but they know nothing of how I truly am, since I have a "secondary" sort of personality that is bubbly and friendly with people and very noble.

    The fact that you acknowledge your past and have overcome most of it definitely make you everything but incapable of supporting your friends or finding a woman. If you can just tell these people you've had shit in the past and have learned to move on, they shouldn't be saying those things. Then there's something wrong with the way they think because if you don't make mistakes in life, you'll never know experience and experience is knowledge and knowledge is power.

    Is it wrong? I feel like I am rejecting my humanity, I loathe the mistakes I make and often beat myself up for them, I reject emotions in all situations and even sometimes try to trick myself into thinking I can feel emotions when I am not feeling anything no matter how hard I try. Even when sad things happen, I try to force myself to cry but nothing but crocodile tears come and my body does not give in to the emotions itself.

    I feel like I really fucked myself up. My self-esteem is great though and I have already been through my depressions and survived them but, am I too late to fix? I don't want to believe that I am a broken human being but, my brain keeps telling me I am.

    I can follow this, I sometimes wonder if I'm incapable of feeling emotions again, but then I remind myself how annoyed I can get when I play smite . On a serious note tho, nothing is too late to fix, you just have to put your mind to it, or you will never get "fixed". Also, I have trouble feeling good emotions such as excitement, but I continuously feel guilt or anger. The good emotions I "feel" are some things that manifests inside my head because I've learnt what it looks like to have them, so it's easier to just fake them. Don't try to force your emotions, they'll come to you, tho going out and such helps.

    Forgive me if this is confusing or jumbled up, I really need to vent because I never tell anyone about my problems. No one ever understands when I tell them so I just gave up on talking to people about it.

    People are retarded, it's about finding people who aren't.

    I just think I need help is all. Has anyone else dealt with this? How have they overcome it? Part of me wants to never find love and shut out everyone, the other part wants to find love and have friends again but is too scared to do so.

    Both parts often come to the same conclusion over and over which is to just run away.
    You can't run from your problems forever, but run until you're strong enough to face them head on because if you don't, it'll be your own downfall.

    Please don't take this as if I'm trying to pity you, but if you want to talk, you can find me in game ;-). My IGN is EmmaMye, not sure if that's what shows up as on the forum page, so I put it here lol.
    "They see me rolling... the wrong way"

  10. #30
    Senior Member Honoured LunSei's Avatar
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    I'm going to be very blunt here.

    If you think that being shy and antisocial is "a trauma", then trust me, you are VERY VERY VEEEEEEERY LUCKY. Because you do not know what a REAL trauma is like.

    When a girl thinks you're ugly, it's not because you are physically ugly. I've been attracted to some rather ugly and even irritating men, but they had a lot of confidence in themselves, and they irradiated it. They had a positive aura about them, and it made them attractive. What makes you ugly is not so much your body, as your mind. I can tell just by your posts that you have a negative aura about you, so imagine what people feel meeting you in person.

    Your solution?
    Stop commiserating yourself. You do NOT need people patting you in the back and saying "there, there". You need people shaking you rudely and shouting "WAKE UP AND STOP SELF-COMMISERATING YOURSELF!!".

    You think your problems are big. Trust me, they are not. If you let yourself go down for this, you will not be emotionally prepared to face life when much bigger problems appear.

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